Will Boot Camp work out for Juvenile Delinquents?

After watching the cyber wars against Ah Lians and Ah Bengs at HWZ recently, I just start to wonder if the ALs and ABs know what they are doing in their life. They glorify under-aged smoking/drinking, take pride that they belong in gangs and electronic tags end up as a form of battle trophy. Many psychology theories agree that the adolescent period is the period of identity confusion where teenagers are doing their best to search for a place where they belong (regardless of whether it’s good or bad).

The main issue that got me worried was that these at-risk kids are getting a lot younger (ranging around 12 years old) and they openly glorify their actions of stealing bikes, smoking, belonging to gangs, etc in their blogs. Although I understand that there are many reasons why many adolescents turn delinquent, I have to say that most of the rehab programs lack the resources to deal with each juvenile delinquent on the individual level. Most of the rehab programs like probation, Girls' Home, Boys' Home, etc seem to be unsuitable for many delinquents because they seem determined to glorify in their “badness”. Like one professor once said to me, they probably gave up being the best of the best, so they decided to be the best of the worst because that’s the only thing they can hope to achieve.

Many juvenile delinquents (JD) are typically from low SES, broken/dysfunctional families and are overly represented in the NT population. Most of the time, they are the by-products of ill-discipline and poor opportunity. Personally, I think the growing rates of JD are due to the maturing of the “spoilt generation” of Singaporeans. This is a generation that I notice to be very spoilt- their parents give them everything they want except close parental monitoring. In fact, it has reached a stage where many parents use extremely large amounts of pocket money as a form of compensation for the lack of time spent interacting with their kids. In my day, pocket money would be sufficient for my meals only. MacDonalds and trips to the cinema were a privilege, not a routine. Many parents today don’t even know their children’s timetables or what their kids are doing in their spare time.

You can read an academic paper about factors affecting JD in Singapore here.
Although there has been a slight drop in JDs arrested over the years, I question if it is because less of them get caught, or are there actually less JDs around. In my biased opinion, I suspect the former is probably true. Given the Flynn effect, is it that hard to believe that JDs may have found a way to outsmart the criminal justice system? It’s quite possible. With the help of the internet, many people are learning and doing illegal stuff. Did you know that Youtube has a video on how to pick locks?

So the big question is how to deal with these kids? Personally, I’m in for the break and re-mould concept of shaping them again. What I propose is a lot more radical than the Boys' or Girls' home and let me clarify. What I have in mind is for the extreme JDs, the type that probably have conduct disorder, no respect for authority, no self respect and a conscience that probably went into coma a long time ago. I tend to favor discipline as the cause and solution to all of life’s problems. Boot Camp would be the best place to teach them that. Many psychologists are of the opinion that placing a group of JD together would only make things worse because they learn more deviant behavior from each other. Personally, I agree but I think the context matters. I propose an environment of mentoring and encouragement through discipline, teaching them life skills and learn that they are respected as individuals. So this is my idea of boot camp:

Duration: 1 Year

Admission Criteria: Beyond Parental Control children. They may only join the program if the teachers, counsellor, judge and parents deem it necessary.

Intake: 60 at a time. 30 male; 30 female. Divided into 3 platoons that train, eat and live together (divided by gender of course)

Entry point: No overnight bags needed. Report in as dressed. Cadet’s personal items will be removed and they will be issued a set of essential items- plastic glasses, toiletries, towel, underwear, uniform, PT kit, running shoes, boots and led to their bunkers. Male and female cadets will be shaved bald and all forms of personal adornment (i.e. rings, ear rings, necklaces) will be removed. This is to deprive all of them of a sense of identity and make them easier to train.

Program:

1. Briefing about the rules. One 5min phone-call allowed each month. Both parents and cadets are strongly encouraged to write letters. Cadets must make their own bed, clean their bunks and wash their toilets.

2. Briefing about how to wear the uniform, how to tie the boots, who is who is the camp.

3. Basic footdrills will be conducted

4. Basic combat drills, live firing and hand grenade to teach them the value of life.

5. Obstacle course to inculcate respect for others, not just authority, but peers too. Group dynamics would be a focus in these courses to reinforce the need to respect themselves and those around them.

6. Inculcate anger management skills by offering incentives for obedience and punishment for insubordination.

7. Inculcate communication skills and focus on how to express themselves in a healthy manner.

8. Have regular sessions with counsellor and psychologist to help them understand their own behavior and how to improve themselves.

9. Engage in gardening and animal husbandry to teach them the value of how to nurture.

10. Cadets will be given a pig/rabbit to take care off when they first arrive and they'll be asked to shoot their pig/rabbit 6months down the row for food. Cadets will not be forced into slaughtering their pet. It is an exercise to help them understand how their parents feel about bring up their children only to see them grow wild and face the decision of "terminating" them.

After the 3months of isolation for intensive training, they will be allowed to have a day or two off per week just like the normal NS men. If they mess that up, they forfeit that freedom.

Resources required: 1 cook, 1 on-site psychologist, 1 on-site counselor, 6 training instructors (3 of each gender) and 1 medical officer.

After the 1 year of training, a support team of psychologists and counsellors that will still keep in touch with them for up to 5 years. They will be offered a slot in skill training courses to make them more elligable for the work force. In addition to that, I propose that they be awarded with a certificate of recommendation if their instructors, psychologist and counsellor all agree that he/she is worthy of it. After this boot camp stint, I'm pretty sure they'll start to appreciate home and family a lot more.

This is my idea. I tried presenting it to someone and receive the feedback that it is too idealistic and I should get off my moral high horse. Perhaps I am on a moral high horse, but than again, its just a radical idea isn't it? I don't feel a compulsion to help these "poor souls" afterall, the fall of each one means that I stand higher in life! But the thing is, I think they deserve better and why not offer them a last chance to improve their life? I view this as the last ditch effort to save these delinquents from a permanent career as criminals or poorly paid individuals.

This camp is what I would describe as a make or break. I've met enough "retired" delinquents and career criminals (aka gang members) who regret their hey-days and spend out the rest of their lives working for peanuts at low-skill jobs. They would tell me stories of how they had many chances to live a better life but they messed up everything in their desperate efforts to become rich and powerful the fast and easy way. I will always remember their one and only advice to me: "Don't end up like me".

If you thought I'm radical, watch this boot camp for problem kids in China.

Extra-ordinary people: Are they better off dead than alive?

Sorry for the lack of updates, I've been obscenely busy. Anyway, today, I'm sharing some videos from youtube. The theme is basically concerning living miracles- are they better off dead than alive?. After talking to so many people who are so caught up in the miseries of their personal lives, I've decided to do a post about some individuals who are suffering more than us and hopefully, we would learn how to appreciate ourselves and those around us better. The following videos are GRAPHIC. I hope that after watching them, no one will say anythig insensitive.

The Boy with Half a Brain

Poor kid got shot in the head. It is pretty much a miracle how he survived without half of his brains. I could tell that most of his right parietal lobe is gone. That is the part of the brain that deals with sensory-motor functions. People with brain damage there have problems trying to match the real world with the perceived one. So if you had them a card and tell them to slot it into the box, they can probably describe the slot to you but can't put it into the slot. This is but one example and it doesn't occur all the time. Because the brain is such an intricate organ, damage to one tiny part alone can cause a LOT of problems.

Treacher Collins Syndrome

This is a genetic illness caused by recessive genes. When I saw this video, I was more disturbed by comments that the kid is better off dead than alive. I just wonder if that is the right attitude to have but honestly, I rather my parents finish me off if I look like that... (Yes, I'm horribly vain.)

A Woman without Arms

I really have to take off my hat to this lady. She is probably a living proof that physical deformity is not the end of the road towards a fulfilling life. =) Her determination is truly a source of inspiration. I just feel sad that there are people who rather criticize her for being imperfect rather than admire her for her courage and determination.

8 limbed girl

I always believed that whilst people should respect traditions, they should no be a slave to them. This girl is obviously no having a good life and instead of seeking help, she is denied treatment because they believe her to be a reincarnation of Lakshmi.

The Tree Man


The Man with a 20kg tumour on his face


Looking at all the people above, is it right to say that they are better off dead than alive? Are their lives worthless and meaningless just because they were not born physically perfect/wholesome? I think there are too many issues to contemplate over this.
1. Should parents have the right to let their children die naturally if they are born imperfect?
2. Does the society have the right to eliminate the imperfect people of the world (assuming social darwinist mentality is applicable here)?
3. Are the "victims" allowed a choice to live or die?
4. Where do we draw a line between "not worth living", "worth a try" and "still can cope"?

The Battle of the Sexes- who is worse when it comes to keeping secrets?

A new study has suggested that women cannot keep secrets for more than 47 hours.

Researchers found that women are overcome by a burning desire to share gossip as soon as they hear it.


They will typically spill the beans to at least one other person in 47 hours and 15 minutes.

The study of 3,000 women aged between 18 and 65 also found that four out of ten admitted they were unable to keep a secret – no matter how personal or confidential the news was.

Intimate issues, true cost of purchases and affairs emerged top of the secret-keeping list, with girls most likely to share a secret chatting face-to-face, on the phone or via a text message.

Fortunately for some though, over a quarter (27 per cent) said they forgot what they were told the following day

Taken from: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/6199822/Women-cannot-keep-a-secret-for-longer-than-47-hours.html


That's not all, men have been found to gossip more than women because they need an ego boost.

MEN indulge in gossip more than women about secret liaisons, inept lovers and overpaid colleagues, a study says today.


It helps boost their confidence, says the survey of American college students. Women are more inclined to pass on tittle-tattle to bond with their friends and build closer relationships with colleagues.

Presenting her findings at the American Psychological Society's annual conference in Toronto, she said the report challenged the widely-held view that women gossiped more than men. She said: "Men definitely seem to be getting more out of gossiping than women.


"We found that men felt better about themselves when they criticised another person's behaviour. It gave them a sense of moral superiority and showed others that they knew the difference between right and wrong."

Miss Hom added that rather than creating strife in the office, gossip tended to relieve the stress of arduous work and the long hours spent in front of a computer screen. She said: "It is a vital function of social inter-action. Often it helps to break the ice among people."

The findings follow a study by the Industrial Society that said gossip should be encouraged in the office by providing more communal areas in the workplace.

Prof Nigel Nicholson, a psychologist at the London Business School and the author of a book on human behaviour, Managing the Human Animal, said: "Men enjoy a gossip as much as women, but they call it networking instead."

Taken from: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/1311999/Men-gossip-more-than-women-to-boost-their-egos.html

Well well, it seems both genders can't keep secrets at all! The only difference lies in their motivation for revealing secrets- men for the sake of "networking" and "ego", and women for the sake of "stress relief". Personally, I never trusted both sexes much. After all, you'll never know when you'll argue with friends and stop talking to each other. And you can never predict if your former friend wouldn't spill the beans on you.

Are Singaporean parents Authoritative or Negligent when bringing up their children?

This post will be an extension of my previous post- "Should the parents of Ah Lians/ Ah Bengs be blamed for their deviant behavior". This time I will focus more on the parenting techniques identified by psychologists and what kind of children do they create.

Have you guys realized that over the past 10 years, there has been a sudden boom in the market for family/parent related magazines, forums and websites? In my opinion, this sudden surge in parenting interest could be due to the following factors:

-More highly educated parents who believe in the virtue of using “science” to establish the “best” parenting style for their children.
-Guilt that parents aren’t spending enough time with their children
-Increased social pressure to be nothing but the best. So parents want the best kids and hope to achieve that through the best parenting approach.

So what parenting styles are there? A psychologist named Barumrind came up with the concept of a tripartite classification of parenting styles in 1967 using four orthogonal dimensions- consistent discipline, maturity demands, destructiveness and encouragement of independent conducts. This results in 4 types of parenting styles: Authoritative, Authoritarian, Permissive and Neglecting.

This model is way too US centric anyway. =) In local Asian culture, beating children who are naughty is NOT considered abusive as long as it doesn't cross the line of causing the child long term emotional, psychological and physical trauma/injury.  In the US system, they don't hold to the "spare the rod and spoil the child" ideology, so Asian parenting styles are classified as Authoritarian parenting simply because they lack the element of warmth. The Asian and European perception of warmth differs greatly. To Europeans, warmth/love is expressed through physical expressions of affection, such as hugs and kisses. To Asians however, warmth/love is expressed through less "intense" means such as cooking herbal chicken soup, nagging, caning a child when he/she is naughty, etc.

It is commonly excepted that the Authoritative parenting style is the most effective, especialy if parents adopt a democratic approach to parenting (as suggested by Baldwin et. al. in their 1955 paper). The democratic approach refers to parents who communicate the demands of the real world to thier children instead of their personal demands.

Given the penchant of Asian parents issuing orders to their children on what to do and what not to do, punishing disobedience with physical (canning), emotional (locking children out of the house) or verbal (shouting) aggression, Europeans think that Asians only practice the Authoritarian style of parenting, which generally creates more obedient and submissive children who appear to be less spontaneous, curious and creative. However, I would like to question- are Asian children obedient and submissive because of their parents or because of cultural norms?

Ask any Asian parent and they will tell you that they cane their children because they love them not and it is for their own good. Asian parents would also say that they make decisions for their children because their children are not ready to make an informed choice. These examples clearly violate the typical American belief that punishing children would result in nothing parental abuse in the long run and that children should be given the independence to make their own decisions in life.

In other words, Asian parenting should resemble the Authoritative model, so it should be within healthy boundaries. Unfortunately, the model does not account for additional factors such as parental kiasu-ism and having the fostering of parenting duties to maids.

To me, I think Singaporean children are over stressed by their parents' expectations of them. Furthermore, given our traditional beliefs, many Singaporean children today can't differentiate between what they want and what their parents want out of them. Somewhere, somehow the line got blurred along time. I think it’s just plain sad that many of the teenagers I’ve met don’t know what they are doing in life. They are just caught in the web of confusion stemming from a loss in life goals.

With the increased affluence among Singaporeans stemming from having both parents working full time, I would suggest that many Singaporean children suffer from emotional neglect even though their daily needs are met by their maids. For one, their parents return home late at night tired and irritated from a hard day at work. They usually spend a little time with their children but do not want to be bothered by their children’s constant demands for attention. I’ve seen parents telling their kids to go watch TV whenever their kids try to start a conversation on mundane stuff like “Daddy, Mummy, today my friend had a birthday party in school! We had a lot of balloons, than her parents brought ... … …” (you know children and their endless capacity for chatter).

I think Asian parents need to move on with time, given the exposure to western ideals that their children gain from watching television, young children today expect their parents to express more caring questions that most American parents typically portray in movies. These questions could be as simple as “how was your day in school?” or “did you enjoy yourself with your friends?”. This expectation failed quite badly in the face in typical Asian brusque mentality where the most likely question that children receive when they reach home after school would be “do you have any homework?”, “do you have any tests coming up?” or “any results out?”. That’s quite disheartening.

I also think parenting standards have dropped a lot in Singapore. I’ve met parents, who are blissfully ignorant of their child’s favorite dish, what time the child has to go to school, and the worst sin of all, they forgot their child’s birthday. And the saddest part of all, it is often the maid who remembers all of these. Parents leave their maids to make sure that their children have been fed, showered and have done their homework. Which inevitably, leads us to this conundrum of mine once more: "Are Singaporean Parents Authoritative in their approach but Negligent to their child's emotional needs?"

Singapore-the Club of Inspiring Elitists who should learn the value of shutting up if they can't do better

Recently, Ris Low came into the spotlight when everyone started critizing her English- "How on EARTH could someone of her calibre represent Singapore?? So MALU!!" Initially, I was nodding my head in full hearted agreement because she wasn't exactly what I would call "beautiful" or "hot" and her English was a monumental tragedy! She was obviously inarticulate and has trouble trying to organize and express her thoughts and feelings. The words that came out of her mouth were jumbled messes that were in a hurry to run out and trip over each other. The words she employed were really simple and weird...

Furthermore, I felt that she just revealed her ignorance with regards to South Africa when answering question about African-inspired fashion. It’s not just about leopard prints and zebras… In fact, most of the African inspired fashion is largely based on traditional tribal designs based on geometric patterns! The emphasis is on clothes that are outdoor look, color and comfort. Leopard prints and feathers are largely a by-product of the imposition of western ideals on a backward nation. The people there rarely wear fur and feathers except for tribal festivities, simply because it’s too damn hot.

This is an example of Safari-inspired Fashion:

I disagree with her idea of how to carry off animal prints without looking trashy, but I won’t go into it beyond the point “less is more” and no “mix and match”. I would also like to add that fashion is NOT about yourself… The opinion of others DO matter, they decide if you look like an ass or elegant. Your personal opinions do not matter in this case. So back to the old girl, is it that embarrassing to have her as a representative of Singapore? I thought of this question overnight and watched this video again. Surprisingly, I found myself reaching some new conclusions.

1.Nervousness
It is possible to attribute her extreme self-centered speech and bad choice of words to her nervousness. It was quite clear from her body language that she was very nervous. But if that’s the case, would she make a suitable representative for Singapore? She might be required to do speeches and rub shoulders with the political/industrial elites, would her nervousness make her look like a terrible village idiot?

2. Long tongue
I would attribute the countless mispronunciations to her long tongue, or at least I think she has a long tongue. She always sounds like she’s slurping her words. So can’t really blame her for that.

3. Ignorance
Singapore is a country with literate people who are both knowledgeable and yet ignorant in their own way. Thanks to our education system, our knowledge of the world is limited to what we can learn from the success of EMDCs and the reasons why ELDCs still cannot make it. Little effort is done to highlight the failures of EMDCs and how ELDCs do achieve successes slowly but ultimately. I’m hardly surprised when most of the Singaporeans I’ve spoke to:

- think that South Africa refers to the entire African continent
- have no idea that Egypt is part of the African continents
- have no idea what Biltong is
- are blissfully unaware that South Africa isn't just full of Savannas, there are deserts and jungles too! (I dunno how Singaporeans pass their geography exams)
- think the all of Africa still practices animalist worship. WRONG, some African cultures/tribes have been practicing Islam and Christianity as well for hundreds of years.
- are completely ignorant the South Africa is one of the MOST dangerous countries in the world (SA makes the US look safe).

Judging from such communal ignorance, who are we blame her for being ignorant when her strongest critics often need to look at themselves in the mirror first? I refuse to believe it when people insist they are NOT ignorant- rubbish, you can never know enough.

4. Age
She's only nineteen, some might say she should be mature enough, but I beg to differ. Unless she has a voracious appetite for books, nineteen is still the age of innocence and ignorance. She has yet to achieve the financial and emotional independence to see the world as it truly is. Nineteen is still the age where people think that the world is their piece of cake and opportunites for success are open and equal for everyone. They stil need to learn that whilst everyone is equal in society, there are some who are more equal than others. It is at the age where they still think about themselves first over others, the day they start putting others before themselves is the day where they full achieve maturity.

So is it a tragedy for her to represent Singapore? Are her critics any better than her? I always believed that criticism should be constructive and one should not criticize others unless one can prove to be better. I would openly criticize Ris Low because I believe that I’m way better than her in terms of worldly knowledge, fashion sense and linguistic expression. However, I will admit that I’m chronically shy when it comes to talking in front of a group of people. So fair is fair, I’ll shut up because I lost to her in one field.

Now let me move on to bitch about the other Singaporean critics! The main criticism is leveled at her language. I used to think Singapore was a place where good English was heavily prized. That ideal was smashed when I entered the working world. Based on emails and phone calls with “graduates”, “lowly clerks” and “warehouse guys”, I can safely say “Good English does NOT exist anywhere”. The good English that I see are usually from graduates, who consciously remember to follow grammatical rules and punctuations, and from Caucasians. However, it must be noted that not all Caucasians use good English, I’ve met some with worse English than an average kid from primary 6. So does good English have to be a must have for a representative in Singapore?

If you’ve noticed, Singapore has a culture of over-prizing graduate beauty queens. Our beauty queens- Rachel Kum, Joanne Peh and Felicia Chin are highly popular because of their status as graduates! They are seen as the “smarter breed”. However, is that true? They are as human as anyone of us, are we creating an artificial benchmark for them as well as ourselves to reach? What’s wrong with diploma or NT students representing Singapore? They are not part of the elitist culture, but they ARE part of our Singapore culture aren’t they?

For too long we have been obsessed with the idea that only the best of Singapore would be shown to the world, with the other “undesirable” aspects conveniently being swept under the carpet, away from the curious eyes of “foreign investors and dignitaries”. Should we give them a chance to appear in the limelight for once and accept them as they are? They are integral aspects of the culture after all, and the elitist club members are by no means perfect themselves…

As my friend SH said, such competitions are useless beyond their entertainment value. So what's the point of having such competitions anyway? It is all pointless competition engaging pointless people inviting pointless critics. Shouldn't such resources be channeled to more constructive activities such as saving Taiwanese flood victims? After all, the title of beauty queen is just a temporary crown, temporary fame and unnecessary pressure to create a farcical "virtuous image". I could only shake my head sadly when the public insisted that Rachel Kum be stripped of her status as beauty queen just because of some suggestive pictures of her being posted online. Must the public always pretend to have this moral high ground? I’m sure everyone had their heydays that they would rather not mention to their kids today. It’s just a meaningless competition for an empty crown, there’s no need to hold up their personal flaws against them- nobody is perfect.

Strange Creatures Series- Do Dragons exist?

Dragons are legendary creatures with reptilian/serpentine traits that appear in myths in cultures all over the world.Everyone assumes that Dragons are mythical creatures that no longer exist today. But did you know there have been reports of dragon sightings? That sound's looney right? Where on earth can such a huge creature be hiding in? As you see, I assume that all dragons are huge creatures and not their sorry excuse of a cousin- Mushu.

So, let me show you Dragons from around the world:
China: This is a country that is permanently obsessed with Dragons as symbols of power and prosperity. The Dragons in Chinese mythology are considered benevolent and they are very anatomically concise- there 117 scales, out of which 81 are of the yang essence (positive) and 36 are of the yin essence (negative). A Dragon with 5 claws was the representative of the Emperors whilst a dragon with 3 or 4 claws was associated with commoners. Chinese dragons are serpentine creatures with long bodies and four legs. They look elegant yet powerful. Due to its benevolent nature, it doesn't breath fire unless it wants to show divine displeasure.


Europe: European dragons are malevolent creatures who are just out to eat virgins and going for communal BBQs at the nearby villages. In comparison to Eastern Dragons, they are more stout, they have wings and they traded the hair/fur for more horns/spikes. They look much more muscular and aggressive. Unlike the Chinese dragon, which remained as an impressive creature over centuries, the European Dragon shrank in size and stature over the years. The Dragon was a symbol of the Pagan era and with the spread of Christianity, Dragons were reduced to the role of an evil creature being subdued by the victorious arm of Christ (like St George). Looking at the two pictures above, you might notice how the first pagan picture shows a brave hero tackling a bigger dragon, whereas the stylized St-George-killing-the-dragon had a tiny dragon that looked more like a lizard submitting to the might of St George. There are many more stories regarding European Dragons that date back in time, such as the story of Siegfried the Dragon Slayer in the German Nibelungenlied, but I won't go into them because it can go on for over 5 pages.



Ancient Middle-East: I will lump 3 ancient Dragons here from Babylon, Ancient Egypt and Sumeria together here because these three cultures engaged in a lot of cultural exchange with each other.
There are two types of Babylonian Dragons that I know off. One is Marduk (picutre above) that guards the walls of the city and the other is Tiamat, the symbol of chaos. They have many other Dragon stories, but the exact role of Dragons in the life of the common folk remains unknown.
Ancient Egypt's "Dragon" is actually a snake with wings who is always trying to take away the sun. As a result, the ancient Egyptians hated Apep/Apophis.In the case of Sumer, we can only tell that the dragon and dragon slayer(s) relationship primarily involves the dragon, Kur, committing some great wrong against the gods and either a god or goddess appearing to vanquish it. Many portions of the story are still missing as many parts of the tablet were still in fragments. You can read more at the richeast.org link below.

Hisotrial Dragons aside, let's take a look at the list of Dragon sightings that occured recently:

• The most scientifically reliable description is that of Peter Karl van Esling, the director of The Hague Zoo, who gives an account of a water dragon sighted during a voyage to collect marine species in the Atlantic in 1860:
  
  

  We saw a gigantic reptile, bright blue and silver in colour. He swam gracefully
  around the ship before the sailors' eyes, and submerged himself without a
  splash. His eyes were enormous, with vertical pupils and an intelligent expression. They seemed luminous, but this effect could be due to the reflection from the setting sun.
  
  His head was adorned with bright blue and green crests. Even though he disappeared under water and did not reappear, he appeared to measure some seven meters in length, and on his back they could make out something resembling a crest or fins. It was serpent-like, but the sailor thought they saw legs and claw.
  
  They baptized him Megophias.
  

• French-American scientist Rafinesque-Schmaltz wrote of a two hundred foot long sea-serpent seen by Mrs. W. Lee, in 1805, near Cape Breton and Newfoundland. She stated: "Its back was dark green and it stood in the water in flexuous hillocks and went through it with impetuous noise."
• On May 15th, 1833, in Mahone Bay, forty miles west of Halifax, three officers and two enlisted men of Her Majesty's Navy were relaxing on the deck of a fishing boat when they sighted at a distance of one hundred and fifty to two hundred yards:
  

  ". . . the head and the neck of some denizen of the deep, precisely like those
  of a common snake, in the act of swimming, the head so far elevated and thrown
  forward by the curve of the neck as to enable us to see the water under and
  beyond it. The creature rapidly passed, leaving a regular wake, from the
  commencement of which, to the forepart, which was out of water, we judged its
  length to be about 80 feet; and this within rather than beyond the mark . . ."

• The first recorded sighting in Canadian water was on July 15th, 1825, in Halifax Harbour. It was seen by several people from entirely separate positions. They described it as having "a body as big as a tree trunk... The animal had about eight coils or humps to its body and was about sixty feet long."
  

Watch this video and decide for yourself- is it real? Was it merely coincidental? Or was it a product of modern technology?


Our ancestors told us stories of many types of dragons- mainly water dragons and flying dragons. This seems to be a constant factor in folklores throughout the world. What made them come up with the concept of dragons if dragons never really existed to begin with? Some have speculated that the myth of dragons was born out of the discovery of dinosaur bones- probably the ones like the Brachiosaurus or Apatosaurus (in layman terms- the long necked dinosaur). Typical of the brainy morons that we are, it is assumed that our ancestors lacked the expertise to piece the (probably incomplete) set of bones together to form a proper dinosaur and created a creatures which they deemed to be a dragon. Heh, we call ourselves clever and we can't even reverse engineer accupuncture, treppaning, the Pyramids of Egypt, etc. So I think humans need to shut up and be less arrogant about their beliefs in their alleged superiority. We have traded our brains for technology- now isn't that a sad thing??

Information Taken from:
http://www.thecryptmag.com/Online/23/Dragonsightings.html
http://www.richeast.org/htwm/dragons/dragons.html

Strange Creatures Series- Do Mermaids exist?

This will be the first of my series of posts on strange creatures. As my regular readers should know by now, I love the unknown. I find it extremely interesting and thought provoking as it challenges our assumptions on what the world is. Today, many people like to think they are rationale and logical, leaving no space for the supernatural in their daily lives. Well, humans have existed for thousands of years and our history is steeped with superstition, stories of weird creatures, spirits and demons around us. I would also like to point out that superstition seems to be pretty uniform across cultures. Isolated cultures such as the Aztecs, Vikings, Ancient Egyptians, Greeks, Chinese and Polynesian all have tale of dragons, mermaids, etc. Is it because we have the same ancestral origin? Or is it because our ancestors have encountered such creatures before? So are these creatures myths or legends (albeit rare or extinct today)?

So today, I shall focus on mermaids. Mermaids are aquatic creatures with a human head and torso but a tail of an aquatic animal, normally a fish. Some cultures portray mermaids as saviors of drowning sailors, other say that mermaids cause nothing but trouble by distracting sailors and thereby wrecking their ships. Given that most sailors are horny wrecks after being out at sea for months, it is hardly surprising that anything resembling a woman is enough to catapult them into state of ecstasy, making them oblivious to any form of danger. Please note that when there are mermaids, there are mermen. =) Nature is about balance.

The earliest known mermaid story appeared in Assyria about the Goddess Atargatis who killed the mortal shepherd that she loved. Ashamed, she threw herself into a lake to take n the form of her fish. Unfortunately, her divine beauty would not be concealed so she took the form of a mermaid. The earliest representation showed her as a fish with the head and legs of a human. Later it evolved into the “traditional” form of a humanoid head and torso with a fish tail (it’s all about symmetry I guess). The story about Atargatis also went on to inspire the story of Derketo the Nereid of Greece, tales of the Sea people in Arabian Nights, malevolent and benevolent mermaid-human interactions throughout other cultures globally.

Now, let me examine the evidence of the existence of mermaids in the modern context. There have been claimed sightings of living and dead mermaids throughout history. Let me list a few:

• 5th century CE- Physiologus described a “real” mermaid in his book, Bestiary.
• 1493 CE- Christopher Columbus reported seeing three mermaids playing and jumping out of the water. He did lament that they weren’t as beautiful as he expected, but human enough in the face.
• 1560 CE- Autopsy performed on 7 mermaids caught by fishermen in Ceylon (Sri Lanka).
• 1608 CE- Henry Hudson and his crew saw a mermaid near Russia. Unlike the typical fish tail, he said that she had a “tail of a porpoise and speckled like a mackerel”.
• 1718 CE, a "sea wife" is caught off the island of Borneo and put in a large vat, where it died after a few days. It was heard to utter cries like a mouse.
• 1739 CE, sailors of the ship, Halifax, caught and ate several mermaids in the East Indies. Apparently they tasted like veal.
• 1830 CE, a farm woman in the Outer Hebrides spotted a mermaid frolicking in the water. They were unable to capture her alive but did manage to kill her with a rock. The corpse was seen and described in detail by Alexander Carmichael, a well-known scholar.
  

In addition the claimed sightings, we have preserved bodies of "mermaids" to show! They are namely the ningyo mummies stored in Japanese temples. Eating their flesh is said to give one longevity. Please note that these mummies are not real, they were "proven" to be made of animal parts that were stitched together. But it could be the influence of science on superstition too! So you decide for yourself whether you want to believe in these photos. Either way, I'll never ever going to look at kiam-he (salted fish) the same way again.

This mummified 6-feet mermaid carcass was from Shikoku, Japan.

What I find most creepy about this mummy is the eyes... Staring right back at you. Hehehe, just joking, I don't get creeped out by mummies because I love to study them! This one is cute because of the eyes. It is normally one of the fastest organs to rot due the high levels of liquids. This is one of the few mermaid mummies with fully scaled bodies.

This is a foot long Ningo that was actually created in Japan in the 19th century. A mummified monkey and a dried fish were sewn together to produce this creature.

Look carefully at this mummy, I would agree that this is a fake because of the sudden break between humanoid and aquatic components of the body. If you look at preserved bodies, there should be a form of harmonious "shrinking" during the drying out process.

This mermaid mummy at Zuiryuji Temple in Osaka, which was bestowed to the temple as an offering from a Sakai-area trader in 1682.

Again, this mummy has a remarkably preserved set of eyes. You might note that the break between the scales and skin seems pretty harmonious and the corpse/carcass looks "intact" after the process of drying out.

Another mummified mermaid is preserved at Myouchi Temple in the city of Kashiwazaki in Niigata prefecture. This mermaid is about 30 cm long and is posing with its hands up near its cheeks.

This Mummy is very unique because of its head. It has 2 holes for the eyes and 2 holes for the nostrils and sharp teeth. It looks like there is a layer of clay on it due to the visible cracks on in. In a sense, it looks like a chinchirro mummy, which has a layer of clay painted onto it.

This mermaid mummy is preserved at Karukayado Temple outside the city of Hashimoto in Wakayama prefecture. The 50-cm long mummy has fang-like teeth that protrude from its wide open mouth and both of its hands are raised to its cheeks, like the previous mermaid. Its lower body is covered in scales, and there appear to be the vestiges of fins on its chest, as well as a pair of nipple-like protuberances.

This mermaid is amazing to me because of the amount of care devoted into the details.

This mummy is in the possession of a Shinto sect headquartered in the city of Fujinomiya near the base of Mt. Fuji. At 170 cm tall and 1,400 years old, it is the largest and oldest known mermaid mummy in Japan. The mermaid has an unusually large head that is bald, except for some hair growth that extends from its forehead to its nose. Its eyes and mouth are open. It has webbed hands with sharp claws, and a 20-cm long tail. The lower body has a bone structure similar to that of a fish, but it is unclear whether or not the upper body has a bone structure. The entire body shows signs of having been ravaged by moths.

Legend has it that this mermaid appeared to Prince Shotoku (Shotoku Taishi) as he was passing along the shores of Lake Biwa (about 1,400 years ago). The hideous beast told the prince about how it had been transformed into a mermaid as punishment for making a living as a fishermen within the boundaries of an animal sanctuary. The mermaid claimed that over many years it had come to a clear understanding of the horrors of destroying life, and that it was prepared to move on to the next world. As a final wish before dying, though, it asked the prince to establish a temple using the mermaid’s body as a centerpiece, where it could be used to educate people about the sanctity of life. The mermaid then died. The prince took the mermaid’s body and set up a temple as requested. But after a number of strange occurrences, the mummy was passed on to another temple. The mummy changed hands several times before ending up at its current location at the base of Mt. Fuji.

Isn't it interesting how physical evidence does not match the sightings reported by people? Or how physical evidence cannot express a mermaid's ability to communicate with people as the stories tell? Every mermaid mummy that has been examined by scientists have been declared fake. And yet, hundreds of people every year claim to see mermaids frolicking in the waters. So are mermaids real or merely figments of our imagination that have been constructed by cultural beliefs?

There seems to be a fixed set of poses and features that these mummies share, such as the curved tail, stiff arms held up to their faces, scales, etc. On the personal level, I'm inclined to say that these mummies are fakes due to their dramatic posing. If they are truly natural mummies, they would have been a little more "relaxed" in their poses. If you have seen a kiam-he, you should realize that their bodies and limp, with the tail lying straight, not the curved tail that you see on these mummies. The only way to create such poses is to bind the body in a fixed position during the mummification process. I did another post on preserved bodies before, you can read it here.

Personally, I've never examined the Ningyo mummies, nor have I seen any documentries performing CT scans on them. So I can't concretely declare if they are fakes or not. To me, to fully qualify them as fakes, I would like to see CT scans establishing that the mummie's innards and bone structures do not match in anyway. However, given their status as sacred objects, I think that is highly unlikely.

So do you believe that mermaids exists for real? Do we need concrete evidence to prove that something exists?

Research taken from:
http://www.beautiful-mermaid-art.com/real-mermaid.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mermaid
Pictures of mermaids and desciptions are taken from:
http://www.pinktentacle.com/2006/08/mermaid-mummies/

The war against Obesity

WK did a post on food called "It's What You Eat, And How You Eat" before. Today, I will explore the reasons why people are obese.

Most Singaporeans are so caught up in the pursuit of the slim image of perfection that fat people are looked down upon without being understood. I would admit that I used to look down on fat people as slobs who sweat a lot and smell funny (I have a sensitive nose). But I've changed my perceptions of them a little as I grew older and researched a little more into obesity.

Not all fat people are slobs
I've met fat people who exercise more than me, eat less than me and work more than me. I feel so ashamed. For the record, not all fat people are obese because they eat unhealthily and do not exercise. Genes do play an important role, namely the FTO gene.

People carrying one copy of the "fat" FTO variant had a 30% increased risk of being obese compared to a person with no copies of that version.

Those carrying two copies of the variant had a 70% increased risk of being obese, and were on average 3kg (6.6lb) heavier than a similar person with no copies.

Now ladies, do you always wonder why you have so much trouble going on/keeping to a diet? [Evil Laughter] Just kidding, I don't believe in dieting because you only live once and you live in Singapore (food paradise). If you don't enjoy all the sinful kopitiam food now, you won't get to try it when you're dead.

The sinful nature of carbohydrates (Sugar)
A lot of people love candy, but that's not it! People love cheesecakes, cookies, crackers with sugar on them, roti prata sprinkled in sugar, pineapple tarts, etc. Many people are addicted to sugar without knowing it. The classic example would be drinking lots of coke and sprite when you could have drunk a glass of water instead. You can read up a little more about sugar addiction at this website.

The main role of carbohydrates is to supply us with energy for our daily needs. Unfortunately, evolution has made as crazy for carbohydrates because our ancestors were once hunter-gatherers who may have to go without food once in a while. That eat and starve cycle imprinted a need for high-carbo food into our psyche, so that we can store the extra carbo as fats, from which we can draw extra energy from when we are unable to obtain food.

Comfort Food
"Food is the most primitive form of comfort" - Shelia Graham
I'm sure you guys have watched Shrek 2, I liked the conversation between the King and the Fairy Godmother, especially this part:

"Harold, you force me to do something I REALLY don't want to do! My diet is RUINED, I hope you're HAPPY."

When people get upset, food is a great source of comfort. Especially food high in carbohydrates/sugar, like ice-cream!! Comfort food can also be food that are emotionally significant to us. So for an average Singaporean, it might mean feeling a need to eat good kway chap, a dish that your grandmother used to cook for you when you feel stressed out.

Dysfunctional Brain
Anything good or bad can be blamed on your brain. Be it bad temper, aggression, optimism or greed, it all comes from your brain. As no one is perfect, we all have a little dysfunction that makes us "unique"/"wierd" (depending on your perception). In the case of the 5 year old girl in India who is eating herself to death, literally, it is suspected that she has a dysfunctional pituitary gland. The pituitary gland releases hormones to restore homeostasis- i.e. physical and emotional needs. So in this case, her pituitary gland is not releasing the hormones that control eating. There are "hunger hormones" like ghrelin, orexin and PYY 3-36 and "satiety hormones" like leptin, obestatin, nesfatin-1. They control when and how much you eat and when to stop eating. The way this 5 year old girl eats is horrifying-

In just one week, she devours over 10 kilograms of rice, 24 eggs, six litres of milk and five kilos of potatoes.

Her hunger even leads her to sneak out and pester her neighbours for food in the village of Metiala in the Indian state of West Bengal.

"We give her four square meals a day and two small lunches, but this is never enough."

"She is our daughter and we have no choice but to feed her."

Aiyee... She's only 5 and she eats more food than an average family of 4 in a week!

While many people are fat because of factors beyond their control such as genes or hormones, there are even more people are fat because they are truly slobs. They love buffets, they binge, they don't exercise.

I don't have an issue with fast food because its just another meal to me as long as it not upsized. I think buffets are bad because of the consumer mentality "I must maximize my dollar"- so people eat more than they actually need. Many of the fat slobs that I know are binge eaters, when they want to eat something, they must eat it, even if they aren't hungry. Eating more than you need to is fine if you balance off the energy storage by expanding more energy through exercise. But many Singaporeans always give the excuse that they don't have time to exercise. I think it's a bad excuse because I know of people who drive to the shopping center nearby even though they could walk or take a bus (2-3stops away). I'll understand if they drive down because they are doing grocery shopping or furniture buying, but not if they are just going there to buy clothes or shoes.

Personally, I disapprove of slimming centers because it is the lazy method of losing weight fast. I prefer having a healthy diet, not eating beyond my daily needs and exercising. It gives people healthier body, mind and soul.

Does technology help or hinder social interaction?

WRITTEN WITH THE HELP OF PHONG

Man is a social animal, evolution has made us so. Why? In the past, the world was a dangerous place where every man needed and extra eye or hand to aid survival. In a social unit, they can share their resources and help each other survive the harsh environment that they live in. As time passed, writing progressed from pictures to symbols and characters. Communication was primarily through verbal and written means. As time progressed, we opened up a whole new world of mobile communication through SMS, emails, MMS, cyber platforms like MMORPGs, Friendster or Facebook! People from all across the world can communicate with each other without meeting up personally and yet know how each other looks like, what are their preferences, age, birthday, etc.

But are these communication methods helping or destroying peoples’ social skills? There are 2 prevailing view regarding technology (the internet) and social relationships. The first theory is old and conservative (mostly created in the 1990s), it proposes that no form of stable or genuine relationship can be formed online and the Internet only served to atomize society, isolating the individuals. In contrast, the modern view was predominantly advanced by Walther, with this theory of the hyper-peronal effects claiming that the Internet and its communication tools actually help to create a lot of affordances to facilitate communication and socialization. More recently, Dmitri Williams also suggests that online games like MMORPGs actually have characteristics of a "third place", which is a sociological concept advanced by Ray Oldenburg to refer to sites of socialization, with the first place being home and second place, school or work.

So this bring out another question, where is the border between virtual versus reality? Yes, MMORPGs, Facebook and Friendster are just social platforms online that are virtual, regardless of how they look. But then, the relationships there are real because real friendships are made, often offline and many become couples. But this line is blurred when people have virtual marriages with ceremonies and attendees (other gamers who are their friends). Facebook and Friendster are based on cyberspace, so their communities are cyber-based, yet their relationships are real in the sense that today A insults B on Facebook, tomorrow, B can kill A for it. That is the real thing. Also, the cyber world has become a platform for people to share their “fantasies” that they are unable to enact in the real world due to social norms and rules- virtual rape, virtual bullying, etc...

Thanks to the technology, disagreements can be displayed using cowardly methods such as cc-ing every “important” person in the company in a bid to “cover ka-cheng”. Either that or cowardly attacks on people’s personal blogs such as leaving hostile messages on tag boards, or making their enemies’ blog links public on community blogs. I’m sure you have heard of stories about husbands or wives telling each other “I want a divorce, I’m leaving you” through emails or sms because they lack the courage to do it face to face.

I’ve also noted that many teenagers today are slaves to technology. It has gotten so bad that many of them are incapable of interpersonal interaction face to face. When I mean incapable, I don’t mean that they are unable to make friends, I mean they are unable to speak their minds, nor are they capable of conveying their opinions through verbal (choice of words) or non-verbal (i.e. body language) means.

Despite this, the internet has been a good place for people to socialize and interact with others from other parts of the world, socioeconomic groups, languages, race and religion. On my end, I’ve gotten to know new people- some good some bad, but every one of them left me a precious lesson on differences in people and their beliefs. I just find that with the ready availability of emails, I hate to call people up or meet them face to face. I prefer long emails that leave me a record of what transpired. =)

Should the parents of Ah Lians/ Ah Bengs be blamed for their deviant behavior?

Ah Lians (ALs) and Ah Bengs (ABs) are such fascinating creatures. I really enjoy disturbing them by being the biggest kaypoh (busy body) to swing by their terrible blogs. I don’t kaypoh because I care for them, but because I’m gathering info! I usually target ALs because they are more emotionally unstable. Based on 6 months’ worth of data collection, when I talk about ALs, I’m talking about teenagers from 13-18 years old who share the following characteristics in varied combinations:

Self Inflated Ego- They like to think they are pretty, but most of them are plain Janes. They normally share the same re-bonded China-doll hair cut, thick make up and an awful taste in cheap clothing. I don’t have issues with rebonded hair and cheap clothes, but ALs have a remarkable talent in making nice hair and clothes look bad. As for thick make up, I think it should be reserved for Wayangs, note for the streets. They like to say stuff like “DM, you jealous of me right? Cos I’m so pretty…” Urgh, I rather die a virgin. What’s more, if you don’t think they are pretty or smart, they mutate into banshees that scream an endless barrage of vulgarities.

Sensitive- they can criticize you, you can't criticize them. They take it VERY personally. They'll threaten to burn down your house, whack you up and start challenge you for your real name, your home address, handphone number and your gender. And I suspect most ALs are homophobic, I guess they just want to get laid by every male that walks across their path in order to feel like they are "wanted" and "desirable". They take rejection personally too, they do threaten suicide (to me, its good riddance to bad rubbish).

Diarrhea of the Mouth, Constipation of the Brains (intellectual poverty)- I realize all ALs can’t debate. All they can do is swear and accuse people of being kaypoh. I find it incredibly amusing that when I leave comments, I get accusation of “stepping English” (since when was speaking standard English a sin?) or for being a kaypoh (I love being a kaypoh, anyone who has curiosity in them will be a kaypoh!). So far, a few ALs have “cursed” me to be childless in future, even AFTER I told them I refuse to have kids due to the 50% chance of them turning bad. The other word they like to use is slut/bastard. Well, pot calling the kettle black in most cases. Heh.

The word “dog”- I don’t know why they have to use the word “dog” on everyone, be it friend or foe. They don’t call people baboons, morons, jackasses, etc. From the Freudian perspective of symbolism, I would hypothesize that it’s a reflection of their behavior:

• They mate like dogs (multiple partners)
• Run in packs (their endless lines of gans and jies)
• Bark a lot (the endless barrage of vulgarities and empty threats)
• Howl to the moon (emotional outbursts at night about being lonely and unwanted by their family)
• Bitch bitch bitch (they are experts at that)
• Run off with their tails between their legs once they meet their betters
  

The inability to swear properly- They are masters of quantity, not quality. They feel very empowered using “f” words and other hokkien words. Unfortunately, their hokkien stinks to high heaven, the sentences often don’t make sense. For example- knn limbei you! (translated as: screw your mother, your father you). That doesn’t make sense doesn’t it? And the part that really made me flinch was the use of CCB by ALs, may their vaginas rot off from overuse.

Self destructive behavior- I find it very cute that they always glorify these three things: smoking, drinking and sex. I think these are activities that no under-aged kid in their right mind would do. What’s more, I’ve been trying to go to a few AL’s blogs to offer them “good advice”. Typical of their rebellious nature, most of the replies I’ve gotten are “who are you to tell me what to do? Stupid Kaypoh”, the nicer ones were “I don’t know who you are, thanks for the advice, but I’ll live my own life”. I have a question “Why is a stranger offering you good advice inferior to that of the gans and jies that teach you how to die of cancer or STD faster?”

If you aren't with me, you are against me- As long as you don't agree with "the" AL way, you are a nerd, even if you can't study. Either that or you're a retard, idiot, bodoh, huan loh, hongster, or whatever, even though you know you are smarter than them and a lot less flirtatious.

Mysterious creatures- no one understand them. Really, you see them declare this all over their blogs. Their teachers, parents, boyfriends and siblings don’t understand their insurmountable pain and anguish over lord know what. Nobody can understand why they do stupid stuff like getting knocked up and going for rounds of abortion. No one understand why they have to waste all their money on cigarettes and alcohol when they highest pay they can get is approximately $6/hr. No one understands why they take so many MCs and leave even though they are earning so little. No one knows why they prefer bad friends over good ones. No one knows why they want to go to NT or NA when they can perfectly well get into express. No one knows why some of them give up poly to join their bfs in ITE. No one knows why they still stay with a boyfriend who rather sleep than go out with them. Are they that stupid? Maybe.

After many scuffles with them, I realize they switch to the “sob” story after some time. They start to cite stories about having a single parent, stepparent from hell, lousy parents, etc. as a reason for their deviant behavior. I think that is a terrible excuse. I’ve met people who come from single parent families with that single parent being a shitty example of parenthood (gambling, loansharks, alcoholism, etc) but they still turned out find. Why? It’s because they have the ambition and determination to pull themselves out of the vicious cycle. So my point is ALs are weak in mind, body and soul. Some ALs reform and improve over time. But hey, a leopard never changes its spots- once an AL, forever an AL. I’ve known a few successful ALs, sadly, financial success couldn’t scrub off their liannie “aura”. Staff and associates would always whisper behind them what an AL she is. So what is a liannie “aura”? This is what I’ve gathered:

• Loud voice- they treat everyone like slaves that require regular rounds of verbal abuse.
• Overly suggestive dressing- most of these ladies are in their late 30s or 40s, most have sam-cham-bak (3 rolls of fat at the stomach region). They like to wear TIGHT clothes that make them look like this:
• Tries too hard to look modern- I’m sorry, re-bonded hair, spaghetti straps, mini-skirts and boots should never be a uniform of lady in her 40s. The effect is revolting.
• Tries too hard to show off her wealth- they like everything that screams money, such as diamonds and branded clothes. I know a liannie in her 40s. She loves Esprit and Ralph Lauren, but somehow, she couldn’t carry off those clothes. Everyone thought they were fakes. They like to decorate their homes with expensive but tasteless furniture. Pink and purple walls do not go well with rosewood furniture nor Da Vinci Sofas.
• The wrong clothes for the wrong occasion- I know a liannie who has to paint her nails beautifully before she goes out, even if it’s to the wet market. And she must wear her LV heels instead of slippers to the wet market. I don’t know what she’s trying to prove.
  

Such deviant behaviors has to start from somewhere. I believe that their parents should be blamed. Granted that most ALs are the worst examples of daughters any parent would want, but I still think parents need to play a more active role in nipping the flower in the bud. Children start to distance themselves from their family once they hit adolescence because it is a stage where, a developmental psychologist, Eric Erikson proposed as a period of “Identity Formation or Identity Confusion. They start to venture out into social groups to form a self identity outside their family.

At this stage, they are the most vulnerable to bad influences because their frontal cortexes are still under developed. Meaning, they are unable to think long term- they rather smoke because it’s cool rather than think of its long term impact on their health and looks. People’s frontal cortex is normally fully matured and stabilized when they hit 21 years old. Until then, I would say that it is the parents who should play a more active role in guiding their children until they are mature enough.

When I mean guiding a child, I don’t mean coddling the child and forcing him/her to do things the parents’ way because they said so. A compromise has to be reached through reasoning- children are not right all the time and neither are their parents. Teenagers need their independence, so parents shouldn’t deprive them of it. Instead, they should teach their teenagers how to obtain independence through responsibility. It can be as simple as making sure curfew times are not breached and how asking for extra allowances might be met if there is a valid reason so that they will learn how to spend within their means.

In the case of ALs, many are from broken families and by the time their parent(s) realize that their kid has mutated in a bitch from hell, it’s normally too late. The years of neglect have finally reflected on their parental incompetence. Their children hate them and hate everything that is associated with the words “good” and “decent”. Their children rather take advice from other hooligans than listen to their parent(s) pleas to be good, study hard and get a good job. When that happens, I always favor chopping those kids off and letting them learn how difficult life is if mum/dad isn’t paying for your living expenses. Let them learn how painful it is to earn a pathetic sum of money only to spend it on food and rent.

So are parents to blame when their kids go wild? Yes. There is always a possibility that a kid’s deviant behavior is learnt or inherited from his/her parent. I know of families with 3 generations of jail birds and school drop outs. So is it the genes, or maybe they learnt how to be bad from dad/mom? Who knows?

Although parents have a big part to play, I won’t deny that some teenagers are really hellish, particularly at the ages of 14-15. They are almost impossible to handle. But parents who are firm and strict enough on their children whilst they were growing up would have laid a firm foundation of discipline and respect. Their children may be deviant, but not to the extent of getting knocked up or hooked onto smoking. Negligent parents wouldn’t stand a chance unless their children are mature for their age. So we’re back to square one- parents should be blamed if their children disintegrate into a swarm of angry bees that sting anything that they perceive to be hostile.

I’m aware that some kids turn deviant because of parental abuse, or should I say “parental abuse”. Some call strict parenting abuse. If you think your parents caning you for swearing, coming back home late, smoking, failing your exams or getting into a fight is wrong, that sod you. You are a bloody self centered ingrate who just can’t recognize that your parents whack you because they want you to improve, not because they hate you. In this case, it’s clearly the kid’s fault and partially their parents’ fault for not realizing that caning is no longer a solution to the problem.

I don’t think there such a thing as “I give up hope, I tried everything and I still can’t correct him/her”. It’s a matter of catching them when they are young and instilling values into them. When they are young, they are like a “tabula rasa” (blank sheet of paper). They are still pure and clean, so as a parent, you write down the values you want them to uphold before that piece of paper becomes yellowed, brittle and crowded with negative values accumulated with age, bitterness and misunderstanding.

Should a Child be Punished for the Sins of His/Her Parents?

Have you ever met people who are so entrenched in their beliefs that they often make stupid and hurtful remarks at the expense of people around them without using any cow sense? This is my story:

Once I tried to talk my friend out of the religious fanatism that she has gotten herself into. I suspected she has histronic personality disorder and she did mention more than once that she was more upset about being at being unnoticed and unpopular rather than being unable to commune with God or for having a weak faith. So after another emo session with her deploring her "ugliness" being the cause of her unpopularity, I sat her down for a good talk. I started off by trying to explain to her that there are people even uglier than her in this world, and how she should not use this as an excuse to diet and exercise like a fanatical moron. This is a rough transcript of our conversation:

ME: "Why do you think some children in this world are born deforned or defective in some way in mind or body?"

HER: "Erm, because of incest lor, It's their parents' fault"

ME: "What??? Who told you THAT?"

HER: "My Pastor lor"

Her answer shocked the hell out of me, I ditched her because I could tell what a lousy conversationalist she would be and I hated Mega Churches with a vengence ever since. I'm fully aware that it might be possible that she misconstrued the pastor because the other Christians that I know have never heard of such a thing. But give me a reason to hate mega-churches a littel more, will you? Anyway, this conversation raised many questions in my mind.

-Is this what religion teaches a person? Christianity's main tenant is to love and forgive everyone!

-Deformed people are a source of reflection that we should be happy with who and what we are. NOT as a source of criticism that they are like "this" because of some action in their past life or their parents' sin.

-What's the point of educating a person all the way to University level if they can't use their goddamn brains?

-What happened to all the science, biology and research topics that we've been given throughout our academic life? Shouldn't they help us to be more open to alternative and more realistic reasons as to how and why things happen?

When I ask this question to anyone else with a brain, that they know how to use, the answer is always linked back to genetics. When children are born like this, it's not because God is punishing their parents for commiting incest! It's just a matter of probability! Almost everyone has a defective gene somewhere in their DNA (we aren't perfect creatures) it can affect your offspring both positively or negatively. Unique traits such as eye color, jaw shape, hair color are all products of "defective" genes that branched off from the original DNA many centuries ago.

Children with deformities are unfortunate because the "wrong" gene was activated due to a freak of nature or because their parents didn't know they had recessive "problematic" genes. So you shouldn't blame the parents nor the children, they are equally innocent becaue it is something beyond their control. Besides, I always maintained the view that God frowns upon such stuff but he must be one heck of a bitchy bastard if he makes an innocent kid suffer for his parents' sin (if any).

Incest is a common sin worldwide, but normally they take pains to ensure that they conduct it discreetly and don't have children. I think every country in this world has laws against incest because it is established that it would result in long term inbreeding problems such as a concentration of genetic coding errors. From what I gather in my research, incest is fine for a few generations, but anything beyond 5 generations is problematic. How do I know this? From studying History!

The best example is the Habsburg Dynasty. Over the course of 500 years, they have intermarried a lot just to maintain power within the family. They are all Christians, so they don't practice incest in the sense of marrying within the immediate family (i.e. parents, siblings or first cousins). By the end of 500 years of marrying cousins, nieces, uncles, etc all the genetic errors accumulated into creating the disgusting Charles II of Spain.

Charles II not only suffered an extreme version of the Hapsburg lip, his tongue was said to be so big for his mouth that he had difficulty speaking and drooled. He also suffered from an oversized head, intestinal upsets, convulsions and, according to his first wife, premature ejaculation.

"He was unable to speak until the age of four, and could not walk until the age of eight. He was short, weak and quite lean and thin. He was described as a person showing very little interest in his surroundings," Professor Alvarez said. "He looked like an old person when he was 30 years old, suffering edemas [swellings] on his feet, legs, abdomen and face. During the last years of his life he could barely stand up and suffered from hallucinations and convulsive episodes," he said.

Taken from: http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/revealed-the-inbreeding-that-ruined-the-hapsburgs-1668857.html

Let us take a look at this German couple- they are siblings who grew up apart and fell in love with each other after the death of their biological mother. Regardless of Germany's incest laws, they had 4 children together. The first 3 children were forcefully taken away from them and place in foster care. It raises the question of ethics- did the government have the right to take away a mother's child from her just because they feel her choice in their paternity was faulty? Their children are all fine and healthy individuals, is the fear of parental influence so great that it necessitates the heartbreak of a mother for the good of her children?
Taken from: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424937.stm

My post is going to be a lot more graphic from now on. I want to use pictures to prove my point "If deformity is due to incestuous parents, that's a very harsh price for their children to pay". In reality, these children are all by products of faulty genes.

Down Syndrome (Trisomy 21)


This is a picture with a kid with Down Syndrome. It is NOT because his parents are incestuous. It is because he has an extra Choromosome 21. Individuals with Down syndrome tend to have a lower than average cognitive abilities, often ranging from mild to moderate developmental disabilities. A small number have severe to profound mental disability. It occurs in approximately 800 to 1,000 births. It must be noted that these statistics are heavily influenced by older mothers.

Harlequin type ichthyosis

Call this baby a demon spawn or whatever and I swear I'll slap you. Children with this defect normally die very young due to infection or dehydration. I can only imagine the pain they are experiencing. The oldest survivor is only 24 years old.

The features of sufferers are deformed facially and cranially. The ears may be very poorly developed or absent entirely, as may the nose. The eyelids are severely everted (ectropion), which leaves the eyes and the area around them very susceptible to trauma. They often bleed upon birth. The lips, pulled by the dry skin, are fixed into a wide grimace (eclabium). Arms, feet, and fingers are almost always deformed in such a way that they cannot bend properly, and may be below the normal size.

Taken from: Wikipedia

It is a hereditary disorder caused by recessive genes. So means if the child's father and mother both have this gene stuck somewhere in their DNA, it might become a dominant gene in the child.

Siamese Twins

Conjoined/Siamese twins are identical twins or non identical whose bodies are joined in utero. A rare phenomenon, the occurrence is estimated to range from 1 in 50,000 births to 1 in 200,000 births, with a somewhat higher incidence in Southwest Asia and Africa. Approximately half are stillborn, and a smaller fraction of pairs born alive have abnormalities incompatible with life. The overall survival rate for conjoined twins is approximately 25%. The condition is more frequently found among females, with a ratio of 3:1.

Two contradicting theories exist to explain the origins of conjoined twins. The older and most generally accepted theory is fission, in which the fertilized egg splits partially. The second theory is fusion, in which a fertilized egg completely separates, but stem cells (which search for similar cells) find like-stem cells on the other twin and fuse the twins together.

Taken from: Wikipedia

Again, they are borned like this due to freak of nature, not because their mother commited incest.

Neurofibromatosis

Neurofibromatosis (commonly abbreviated NF) is a genetically-inherited disease in which nerve tissue grows tumors (e.g. neurofibromas) that may be harmless or may cause serious damage by compressing nerves and other tissues. The disorder affects all neural crest cells (Schwann cells, melanocytes, endoneurial fibroblasts). Cellular elements from these cell types proliferate excessively throughout the body forming tumors and the melanocytes function abnormally resulting in disordered skin pigmentation.The tumors may cause bumps under the skin, colored spots, skeletal problems, pressure on spinal nerve roots, and other neurological problems.

Taken from Wikipedia

If either one of your parents has this gene, you have a 50% chance of getting it. So it depends on your luck. This is what the elephant man suffers from.

Ok, enough of graphic examples. Other genetic problems include: Adrenoleukodystrophy (ALD), Sickle Cell Disease, etc... Go read up more on your own.

Back to the topic, so is it fair for children to suffer from such deformities just because their parents' so called "sin"? Rubbish. Don't look down on these kids, EVER. Admire them and their family for having the courage to grow together and learning how to accept each other for who they are. These children have to grow up with the constant scorn and humiliation heaped at them by the so called "perfect" people who deem them to be misfits in society.

Think again, some of these people who are of "sound mind and body" end up being society's greatest parasites. They don't get proper jobs because they think the job and pay is beneath them, they ruin their health by taking drugs and alcohol, they refuse to study and spend their time loafing at the nearest shopping arcade leering at people, etc. And some of these people end up anorexic or bulimic because they think they are fat. By the time they are done damaging their bodies, even the starving kids in Africa look better than them. So who is worse off?

Ironically, the loudest voice decrying such children belong to religiously devout people. To them, it is easy to point a finger and screech "That child is a spawn of the devil, he is evil!" or "That child's parents must have commited a grave sin like incest for God to punish them with such an abomination" or even "That child's mother must have mated with an animal or the devil himself for such a child to be even born". That's just horrible, why has no one spared a thought for the pain that the child and his/her parents are undergoing?

Why can't people just be themselves?? ( Anorexia Nervosa)

In my previous post "Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder- or isn't it?" I did talk about annorexic women. Annorexia is becoming a really problematic issue in today's society where looks are highly prized over brains. I was surfing youtube and I stumbled across this documentry. Please take time off to watch it. It covers the dangers of online anorexia communities.

I'm sure you guys all know what is anorexia nervosa by now. Personally, I think anorexia is terrible. It makes people look as appealing as a set of chopsticks you can dig out of the nearest bin. It robs them of their mental faculties and common sense. They look half dead and terrible. I don't know how they can find such joy in being such bony wrecks. Even the Jewish P.O.W.s found in concentration camps after WW2 look better than them.



As a food lover, I hate skinny people. They put me off my food because they don't eat together with me. It's so damn unfriendly and plain rude. And I noticed that constant dieting makes them so insecure that they drive their friends away. Because they ask everyone if they look skinny and sexy, and everyone has to lie through their teeth. As anorexia affects women more than men, all I can say is the ideal woman has curves. CURVES you know, like Monica Belluci?



Compared to this:


In Singapore, Anorexia is a growing problem, thanks to this stupid fashion trend that only makes your feet look big- the SKINNY jeans. And thanks to idiots like Fuazi Rassull who denies inspiring his readers to be anorexic. [READ HERE] That's bullshit, people cross the line from being skinny to anorexic when they cannot control the urge to be thinner and they set more and more unrealistic goals when it comes to weight loss. Besides, his moto is "Get Thin or Die Trying" that's a typical anorexic's goal.

But Fauzi, who is also the creator of "The Thinspo Club" on Facebook's rival social networking site Friendster, said all he was trying to do was gather like-minded individuals to share slimming tips.

"I just want Singaporeans to lead a healthy lifestyle as well," he said.

By the way, I hardly call the diet of bread and instant noodles healthy... Anyway,it might be a good thing if he starves himself to death. Singapore is a country that learns best by example. If he dies horribly, his followers will stop following him and society as a whole will learn how anorexics can be so caught up in their own "fantasy" that they die uglier than the day they were born.

To me, the ideal figure should be fit. A little fat here and there is fine. The last thing we need in this world are a bunch of wimps who can only smile and taking pretty pcitures but unable to do any physical labor. In the case of Rassull, I wonder if he's even capable of completing a road march with a full pack or practice 2hours of rifle drill. In fact, I predict that his life might be worse than hell if he enters the army because they will force him to eat and make an example out of him due to his penchant for being flashy.

There are more medical and psychological reasons as to why people become anorexic. One of which is control- eating is something that you are fully in control of. But I won't go into details. I want to focus more on the devastating effects of anorexia on the patient and his/her family and friends. Many people have starved themselves to death due to anorexia. Why can't people just be happy with themselves?

Most anorexics are lonely and they spend a lot of time on self pity and criticism. As a general rule, they are never happy and content. I think it's fine to be a chubby as long as you have a lovely personality. Skinny but sensitive and emotional people are definitely not my cup of tea. =D

In this documentry, the presenter actually experiments with a diet plan provided by one of the "pro-ana" websites. She has to survive on a total meal of 100 calories a day. That means half an apple for breakfast, half an apple for dinner and one cucumber. She broke the diet by the end of the day and was suprised by the sense of guilt that swamped her. When she tried to diet again, it was clear that she was starting to be incoherent and distacted.

In the documentry, it was revealed that many of the anorexis are very young. Approximately 10 years old. They gain inspiration from famous celebrities such as Victoria Beckham, Kate Moss, Kiera Knightley, etc.










This documentry brings out this million dollar question: Should we shut down such websites?

I would also like to highlight that if you're single and you can't find a partner. It might not be because of your looks, but your character. As demonstrated in my previous post "Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder- or isn't it?" there's always someone out there who will love you for what you are. =D Character improvement beats plastic surgery, liposunction or crash dieting because you will always have the knowledge that people hang out with who you really are than what they think you are.

Boys, give me your opinion on what do you look for in a future partner? Please think hard about it and give me your honest opinion.

Girls, give me your opinion on what do you look for in a future partner? Please think hard about it and give me your honest opinion.